No Such Thing as Goodbye
by brittXblc
Summary: Lorelai past away during a car accident. How does Rory deal with it? Oneshot


_Rory, being the main character reflecting on her mother._

_Remember, pure fiction. I originally made this for a different fanfic on a while different site, but it really sounded Rory/Lorelai-ish_

Several cold months grew over time. Every minute was more than enough to handle.

I couldn't even stand to be home, I felt as if my 4 bedroom walls were closing in on me. The house still smelled of her purfume. It's scent was roses, only now it had faded. Certain mornings I'd wake up to that smell, and a smile would plant itself upon my face. Only until I listened to the quietness of the house, and remember she wasn't really here.

My mind still hadn't processed that my mother was gone--And never to come back. She will come back, she will. That's all I could say to myself, to keep from breaking.

And everyone gave their most sincere sympathies, but it only made me more and more distant.

My memories were suffocating me. Hundreds of her photos surround me, each carrying individual moments and feelings. I relived each of them everyday since she past. Each arguement, each hug. Each conversation from the best kinds of coffee, to the lamest movie. I pretended like she was at work, or on a business trip.  
But the worst thing I feel is the call I got. The one that ruined my life, and left a hole in my heart.

**"Hello, Miss Gilmore?"  
"Speaking" I replied, lightly.  
"If at all possible, we strongly suggest you coming to Cornwall Community Hospital right away. It reguards your mother"  
"Is something wrong? What happened?"  
"Miss Gilmore, it's better to just come down here."  
"Okay. I'll be there soon"**

Although it was a brief call, little did I know my whole life was soon to change.

**Fearing the worst, I drove faster than the speed limit would allow to get to that damn hospital.  
Running to the counter where a frantic nurse searched through files, i hit the desk with my fist.  
"Where my mother? Lorelai Gilmore." I stuttered.  
"I'm sorry, you can't see her yet. The doctors are in there"  
"Dammit, tell me where she is! I was called down on an emergency phone call and I want to know what happened."**

**The nurse ran off, in seek of a doctor. I think she may have been afraid of me.  
"Rory?"A doctor caught my attention from behind. "Rory Gilmore?"  
"Yes?" I ran up to him. "Where's my mom? Is she okay?"  
The doctor's face grew into a new expression. Fear, and sympathy mixing with sadness. "I'm sorry. She's not okay"  
The pounding of my heart grew faster. Like while watching a horror movie and the music is speeding up until the scary part comes out and gets you.  
"What happened to her"  
The tears welled up behind my eyes, and the chocking sensation of my heart bounced into my throat.  
"She was in a car accident. A drunk driver-she was just in an unfortunate situtation."  
"But..You're a doctor, you can make her okay. You can, you can. I know you can!"  
"We did all we could. There's nothing left for us to do."  
"Can I see her?"  
"Do you really think your up to it? Maybe we should call other family, or--"  
"No"  
I wanted to so badly ignore his words. Wake from this nightmare.  
Yes, that's it! This is all a nightmare. I lose myself in silent laughs. Any second now, mom will wake me up and hush me back to sleep, assuring me it's just a nightmare.  
I wait, and wait. Still nothing.  
The doctor directs me to the way of her room.**

It took me a second to see, the tears I refused to let out blurred my sight for a moment.  
She was so pale, and cold. Her eyes were shut. I dropped to the floor at the sight. Holding my hand out to her, reaching for her hand to grasp.  
Letting all the tears my small body could hold burst out of my eyes I couldn't accept what I was seeing, or the information the doctor was trying to force in my brain.  


The cemetary is silent. Gusts of wind are the only source of movement around me.  
I draw my fingertips around each curve and letter written on her tombstone, allowing the tears to stain my cheeks.  
One year as now gone by. There's not a day that's passed I haven't come to the grave where her spirit lies.  
**"You're my beautiful Angel. The world is a scary place, but you'll always have me to pull you through it. Rory, you're my rock. My source of strength, and my wishes and dreams come true."**

Mom told me that the day she died. Those were her last words, followed by I love you.

A smile grows from my frown. Now I'm ready to live-For her. Each day, now I know that she'll always be with me.  
Getting up from the tombstone I always grasp onto, I smile. Walking out of the cemetary, and into the world. With my mother forever by my side.

**  
**


End file.
